The Cruelest Restroom: Chelsea Market
I love New York. I love the smells and the flavors and the people and the energy. Did I mention ‘the people’? Because there are a lot of people.
I love New York. But it is a city that took a while to grow on me. At first, I had a hard time dealing with the crowds. And the sometimes-inconvenient transportation. I’m also not a fan of the cold winters–or the wind that whips around the buildings. Or the dogs in sweaters. Oh–and the crowds.
Did I mention the crowds?
Because I have a thing about crowds. The last time I was in the city I made the foolish mistake of trying to walk down 8th Ave. in midtown during rush hour. I forgot about sidewalk traffic. Whoops.
Do you really have to pee? Good luck with that.
Yes, Manhattan is a small island filled with many, many people. I’ve often wondered–if everyone came out of their respective apartments and office buildings at the same time, would be possible to fit everyone in the street? I’m thinking ‘no’.
But with great crowds comes great rewards. Case and point–Chelsea Market. A visit to Chelsea Market makes me want to move to New York. Sure, I’d have to live in a 400 square foot walk up, but I’d have access to all of those olives. And cheese. And cupcakes. Don’t ever forget the cupcakes.
Plus, if I moved there, I’d have one thing a tourist doesn’t have–my own toilet. Which brings me to my point:
The public restroom in Chelsea Market is the cruelest restroom in the world.
It’s not just that the line is long–though the line is LONG (see photo above). It’s that it is stupidly located directly adjacent to a water-feature art installation. Public restrooms like this require a regular plumbing service to avoid issues with the toilets or any other plumbing fixtures.
And by ‘water-feature art installation’ I mean ‘a rushing torrent of water that is complete torture if you really have to pee’. And if you’re standing in line for the restroom at Chelsea Market, you really have to pee. Because there’s no other reason why one would endure such a line–unless it led to the Pirates of the Caribbean ride in Disney’s Magic Kingdom. And even then, it would almost not be worth it.
Because Pirates of the Caribbean doesn’t have a fantastic olive selection. Or a spice market. Or a wine vault, a Thai take-away, a gelato stand, or any artisan bread of any kind.
So I think Chelsea Market wins. I’ll just make sure to avoid the coffee shop next time and I’ll be fine.
This post was awesome, Tracy. I think maybe one of my favorites. I feel your pain. Going to the bathroom in NYC used to be nearly impossible unless, you ate at a restaurant. Back when I lived in Manhattan, it became a logistical thing to know where the available conveniences were located. But that was a long time ago. I think things are better now.
I have to add that on my flight back from Hawaii, on both the Kona to San Fran and the San Fran leg to Newark, there was no food, just candy, nuts, soda, etc., for over ten hours, you get the picture. What does United decide to show for inflight entertainment on both flights but the FOOD Channel. It was an episode about making the best ribs in the USA. Since the entertainment was on a loop on both planes. I got to see ribs being made at least twice if not three times. The final time, I call the attendant over and said, “how on earth can United show people making ribs, ribs for crying out loud, when you won’t even feed us.” The attendant simply laughed and said, “I know, it is cruel – isn’t it?!” It sure was.
Just curious–in what way are ‘things better’? Did they add more toilets in Manhattan? Because I sure haven’t noticed any!
And last time I checked, candy/nuts/soda IS food. Just saying. 😉 I had a handful of (free) almonds at the Toronto airport yesterday. For lunch. Hey–whatever works, right? But yes, the Food Network WAS cruelty!
Love the new ‘reply’ photo of you!!! Is it recent? Your comments about crowded cities really touched base with me, as I just finished reading “Inferno”- Dan Brown’s latest book (same series as “The DaVinci Code”). It’s antagonist is hyper-focused on over population issues. But I have to agree that restroom accessibility is a major issue for us women (and now for my hubby, too, due to his prostate surgery). As to airline food…. YUCK! Except for the old Eastern Airlines (had THE BEST meal on one of their flights) and British Airways (been years since I flew with them though)– airline food is generally awful. Even the snacks they sell don’t often appeal to me. I’m a bit of a simplist and purest. Don’t like ‘fancy’ things. Give me PLAIN potato chips, un ‘flavored’ crackers,Peanut butter, etc.
I’m a New Yorker, and because of work, I often cut through Chelsea Market (PS which guide book advised all the tourists to get the lobster at The Lobster Place?). And I’ve long learned my lesson that the restroom situation at Chelsea Market is ridiculously bad: one awful restroom for all those visitors. Very cruel indeed.
Here’s a NYC travel tip: look for hotels to find a NICE bathroom. Most hotels will have a bathroom on their lobby floors. It will be likely empty and very nice. Beats Starbucks bathroom any day.
I do know of a few hotels with lobby restrooms. But more and more they are locating them on the second floor–requiring a key card for the elevator. Or locking them (also requiring key card). I think they may be on to us. 😉
My problem with Chelsea Market is that it is a place people go to EAT. Restaurants should have restrooms, if only to wash your hands. Which is why I wish I lived there–so I could get takeout. And then go back to my apartment, wash my hands, eat, and pee if I feel so inclined (after all, I like to drink while I eat…)
I googled Chelsea market restroom while waiting in this same line. Your comments are spot on!
Ha! The line is ridiculous, no? And that fountain. Ugh!