I went to Kentucky to learn about bourbon. I was really excited about it. And then I got to Kentucky and everywhere I looked there were long wooden fences surrounding rolling green hills topped with silhouettes of majestic horses tossing their heads around like they were in a freaking horse shampoo commercial and the used-to-be-a-little-girl part of me was like ohmygodIlovethemIlovethemIlovethem and I got kind of distracted.